#sensory

Easter Fun

by Theresa Yeager

Yup, Easter came and went once again this year. And again I felt like a bad mom, horrible Christian and a subpar wife. At least this year I had a semi-understandable excuse. Family is coming to visit in a couple weeks and bringing Easter ‘fun’ with them. No need to do the whole thing twice…. right?

I just kept telling myself that over and over again. At least it took the edge off.

So we went to church. Did some grocery shopping and acted like it was just another Sunday. No basket of goodies. No egg hunt. No gifts or candy to be had. We didn’t even watch The Passion movie. But my oldest did come home from college to visit. So he could take part in the nothing that we were doing….

We did have mini meltdowns all day.

Pinching and kicking aplenty.

And of course crazy amounts of sensory seeking. Being a holiday this was day 3 of no school. No school sensory room. No trampoline or huge gym to run around in. None of those specialty ‘things’ they have at school that help him to not feel so…… oh who am I kidding. I have no idea how he feels inside when he doesn’t get those things. I just know it isn’t a good feeling. I know because he lashes out and is not a happy kid. It makes his struggle with Autism ‘worse’ if you will.

I’m totally stoked for the next 7 days of spring break.

NOT

But at least the flowers are blooming. That’s a good start for the week <3

The most physical activity EVER

by Theresa Yeager

Like so many children with Autism, my Boy suffers from sensory issues. He is bothered by sounds, lights and certain textures. Some of you may have heard of the term Sensory Processing Disorder. This is a disorder where the brain has a problem receiving and responding to stimulus in the environment. We typically think of 5 senses that we receive sensory input from – but there are actually 7!

We are all familiar with the basic 5… You know – touch, taste, smell, sight and hearing. Here is the best write-up I have ever seen explaining the other 2!!

From SPD Australia “Another important dimension of the central nervous system is the vestibular system. This system involves the body’s sense of movement and gravity or the relationship between one’s own body and the earth, i.e., what way is up, down, left, right, horizontal, vertical, etc., and where is the body in relationship to other objects such as a ball, the sidewalk, or stairs. This system also tells the body whether or not it is moving, how fast it is moving and in what direction it is moving.

The vestibular system is responsible for the development of eye movements to track objects (words on page, a ball in the air); movement of body parts in unison; bilateral coordination (the ability to use both sides of the body for activities such as hopping, jumping, catching); and development of right or left handedness.”

SO what exactly does that mean? That means that cutting my Boy’s hair last night was the most physical activity I have ever engaged in!! Hubby tried to hold him while sitting in a chair and I had to hold his head steady with one hand while cutting with the clippers in the other. It took us about 15 minutes, but it felt like hours. I’m sure that the poor kid felt like it took an eternity as well. He would try so very hard, but then the stimulus would be too much for him and he would have to pull away.

Then he had to get in the shower – another sensory nightmare for him. He stood in the shower screaming while we washed the millions of little hairs off of him. And then the toweling off at the end is dramatic for him too. He doesn’t mind the towel drying arms and legs, but the sensation of it on his trunk area is too much and he will resume the screaming again. Thankfully, my teen had the diffuser running with The Boy’s favorite after shower blend – Valor II. So he could run to his favorite spot in the living room, play on his favorite game and smell his favorite scent while I assembled his favorite snack.

4th of July Fireworks

by Theresa Yeager

For the 4th of July we decided to stay home. Why? Over the years we have found that The Boy can tolerate some fireworks, but he needs to feel safe about it. So many think of dogs and our veterans – but my Boy suffers too. Our dogs are easy. They just need some Lavender essential oil. My Boy? He needs to have a place that he can run to in order to get away from the fireworks when he needs to. He needs to not be bombarded with too much too quickly. He also needs to be watched like a hawk to make sure he doesn’t run too close to the fireworks.

Now that we know all of this, and now that fireworks are legal in NY – we just stay home and do our own! We don’t wait until dark because I don’t want cranky kids. And of course everyone is happy when we maintain The Boy’s schedule. A holiday is no fun if you are battling a meltdown. The idea is to do something that the whole family can enjoy. The Boy is part of the family. Just because he has Autism, that doesn’t mean that he shouldn’t be included. Including him is more important than any tradition or preconceived notion about anything I can think of.

So we didn’t split the family up and send some to go watch the big fireworks and others stay home. We didn’t force any children to participate in an activity that they didn’t find enjoyable.

What we did do was make some amazing memories.

My Teen, who really would have missed seeing the ‘big’ fireworks, was thrilled that he was able to light a few. My Daughter was over the moon that she got to pick the order of the fireworks. The Toddler was giddy with excitement that he was able to be the ‘fireman’ and help wet the fireworks after they were set off. And of course The Boy was happy that he could come out and watch some, or run into the house for a little while to get away from them if he needed to. Hubby and I paid close attention to which fireworks The Boy liked to watch and which ones he did not. I can’t wait for next year!

Flying isn’t going to happen…

by Theresa Yeager

Well, if there was ever a doubt in my mind; it has been laid to rest. There is absolutely, positively, no way that The Boy would ever be able to tolerate flying. I mean even if we were able to get him through the trauma of an airport, surrounded by hundreds of people all bustling to somewhere in a hurry – there would be the safety check to deal with. Taking off the shoes would be no big deal, I mean it’s keeping them on him in the first place that is our typical problem. But to have him stand in a machine, holding his arm up for 3 seconds? Ummm nope. Or allowing someone to pat him down? Yeah, right.

But even if by some miracle we were able to get through all of that; the onslaught of sensory input involved in moving a plane and getting it into the air would be too much for the poor kid to bear. The high-pitched whir as we were taxing to the runway seemed to last for-EVER. I was extremely thankful when that part of my pre-flight journey had ended.

Then there is the full body experience of actually getting the plane off the ground. I was sitting in my chair, all nice and buckled in. I sat waiting for takeoff and relaxing the best I could with all the noise going on. By keeping my eyes closed, I became more aware of all the sensations involved – the pressure on my body as we accelerated in order to get the plane into the air. The subtle movement of the plane, up and down as well as left and right. Nothing overly noticeable to me under normal circumstances, but this time I was focusing on the sensory input. My sensitivity to sensory stimuli has increased over the years and I won’t lie, the beginning of the flight was uncomfortable. Even now, as I write this, the noise of the aircraft seems almost deafening to me. I can’t wait to douse myself in Stress Away, exit the plane and find a quiet place to decompress for a little while.

Although, I will say that the sunrise I experienced while flying was pretty amazing.

3 steps to surviving school breaks

by Theresa Yeager

Oh my goodness. I can’t believe it is only TUESDAY!! My wonderful, amazing, energetic and loving Boy has off all week-long for spring break. That means 9 days without services and Hubby and I running without a break. That is rough on a family, let me tell you!

So, let me cut to the chase since I am ready to crash on the couch and try to recover. I don’t even want to think about tomorrow, but I must if I plan on making it through this school break without tons of meltdowns and miserable kids. I’m going to give you all my top 3 tips to surviving when your child has off from school for extended periods of time. It’s not rocket science, but when your brain is mush (like mine is right now!) it is helpful to have a list to look at so you can refocus, regroup and then charge back into battle:

Have some structure in your day. I don’t mean that you have to run a full on school day in your home, but your child will feel much better if the main times are kept the same. If he/she usually has lunch at 11:30, recess and then a snack at 2, try to accommodate that at home as well. Children with special needs tend to like routine and this small step can eliminate a lot of heartache for both parent and child.
Build sensory needs into your routine. If you have a sensory kiddo at home, then chances are that you already have sensory ‘things’ you do at home to get through the night. Now realize that your child isn’t getting any input from his/her therapies at school during the day. You need to up the ante at home. An hour-long bath in the afternoon plus the bedtime bath – not a bad idea!! Let your child play in a dish pan in the sink with bubbles, grab some play-doh or moon sand, dig outside in the dirt, carry rocks from your garden, pull a wagon or push a wheelbarrow, take some time to swing on the swings or climb the rock wall at a local park. Whatever your child’s needs are – you will need to fill them while they are off from school. If you forget to do this, after a few days you will be faced with a sensory deprived child who is a very unhappy camper indeed <3
Family Time
Finally – DO SOMETHING FUN!! Your child is home with you for days on end. You may be counting the hours until you can crash in your bed, but don’t forget that this is supposed to be a time that parents take to bond with their children and do something enjoyable. What does your child enjoy? Pick something that works with your child so that you can enjoy the time rather than feel stressed. Maybe strapping him/her into a stroller and going for a walk in the park would be enjoyable. Maybe a trip to a sparsely populated lake or beach. We love to go to a local creek with hiking trails so that the Boy can throw rocks in the water. It fills his sensory needs (they are some BIG rocks) and the rest of the kids get to look at the wildlife, play in the water and just run around being kids.

The BEST is when there is a park right there too. We can all be together. A family.

Whatever happens over school break, make sure you take a few moments to recharge yourself. Self-care is of the utmost importance. You won’t be able to care for everyone else if you don’t care for yourself. It is hard when we don’t have someone take our child for a few hours and we are constantly going. We are on high alert during break and we go long periods of time without ‘down’ time. Putting your body through extended periods of stress is unhealthy.

So take a moment. It may be the 25 seconds you have to go to the bathroom today. Maybe your child is happily playing on a device for a short time. Seize the moment to care for yourself. This week all I can manage is to make myself a cup of tea, and diffuse some Lemon or Stress Away essential oil to keep my spirits up. I plan to do some serious self-care come Monday when The Boy is BACK IN SCHOOL!!